AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

I'm running for my life...

... oh my gosh... it's so hot. It hurts so much!!!

Someone kill me now! this is too much to take...

Ash in the lungs! Ow!

More later...

RETRACTION: It was steam not ash.

Things kinda settled down a bit now...

What the... what is that?! Holy craaaaa............

EiP EXCLUSIVE!!!! MUST CREDIT EiP!!!!

I have just learned more than I ever wish I would. There isn't much time to write, now. I am being persued - by who you ask? Dick Cheney's Halliburton henchmen. Yes, it sounds too fantastic to be true. Let me fill you in on what just happened.

As I was running and looking back at the same time, I saw something coming out of the steam and ash cloud. It was a black helicopter - maybe a blackhawk, I don't know - and it was coming right at me. The men dressed in tight black, almost spandex like, jumpsuits snatched me up. They put me on the floor and laughed like villians in a movie and the proceeded to tell me what was actually happening at Mt. St. Helens: Nuclear bunker buster bomb testing!

"Holy crud," I thought to myself, "What if John Kerry's right? What if we are our own worst enemy?"

That's all the time I have to write at the moment. I barely escaped by cutting off my arm one of the Halliburton goons was holding onto. I've got to get out of here.

More later....

DailyRecycler is on top of it...

CORRECTION: EiP recently reported it was ash that had entered the lungs of our fearless reporter. Then we retracted and tried to clarrify it was STEAM not ASH. It has now come to our attention it is both STEAM and ASH.